My First Entry at DW!

[cryfreedom]

Thanks to the amazing, gorgeous quiara , I now have a full blown ACCOUNT at Dream Width! I am so excited! What will I use it for? I have no idea. A whole, brand new space to stretch out and test the waters and jump off of things and have slumber parties and, I don't even know, probably crash into a wall because I need a safety helmet to walk anywhere, like Natalie Portman in Garden State, except for the having epilepsy part - I'm just a klutz.

This has been a big, huge, ginormous week for me. I'm on some new medications for my C-PTSD and Anxiety/Depressive disorders and my bipolarosity, and these ones seem to be helping. I will probably create a filter to talk about stuff like this at some later date, but for now, in my first post, I feel the need to let my arse hang about in front of everyone. I've managed to make it to two DMB shows (despite harrassment by staff!), stay overnight in a city that I do not live in, spend hours in an IKEA with the rest of said city, go to Target and Walmart FOR FUN and wanderings, AND make it to a therapy appointment which involved driving around town ALL BY MYSELF. AND I went to the SCARIEST appointment EVER about being re-admitted to school, which I had been dreading forever, and it went WELL!! I'm feeling good, and exhausted, and I'm keeping up my 2 and a half to 4 hour workouts a day, which are giving me something to do while my sister/bff is at work, and keeping my mind off of my shame spiral.

And tomorrow I will go pick up said BFF at work, take her for oral surgery, and then take very good care of her and make her apple sauce and yogurt and soup and other mushy things she can eat with her mouth in ten kinds of pain, and it will be good, because I am very good at taking care of people when they need it, even though recently I've been the one needing the taking care of.

Okay, I think I've shared quite enough personal, raw-innards style stuff for my first official post. I can't wait to poke around here and see what it has to offer!

And again, thanks Q! I heartos you muchos.
xx

Comments

[quiara]

I <3os tu dos! :P

What new meds are you on? I'm on a ton of stuff for C-PTSD/MDD(R)/Fibro/Anxiety/OCD, too! We're drug twins! ^_^

[cryfreedom]

I have been on SO many goddamn medications over the years, at one point I was on like, 9 at a time and they did not mix well, so now we're adding back some of the things I've been on BEFORE, but in a different mixture (thank GOD for psychs who aren't piling-on-the-unnecessary-drugs happy - I have 40 Seroquel pounds I can't get rid of (thanks to PCOS and insulin-resistance) to thank one of those wonderful people for). So right now I'm on Pristiq, Klonopin, Lamictal, the occasional Xanax (we're trying to get rid of that in favor of the Klonopin), Temazepam which I take at night with Melatonin and Valerian Root to deal with PTSD nightmares and insomnia, and Adderall for ADD/ADHD. I also take a mega-dose of vitamin D, a B complex (High potency B-stress) and vitamin C on the more supplemental front. Thank God we decided to go back and try the Lamictal again, because once my current psych said the word "Lithium" I revolted. I was seriously almost out the damned door. That is NEVER going to happen. The side-effects of the meds I've been on in the past were severe enough, thank you very much.

In the past I've been on Effexor, Seroquel, Lamictal, Lexapro, Lorazepam, Wellbutrin, Xanax, Klonopin, Temazapam, Adderall, Ambien, Trazadone, Prozac, ... the list goes on and on and on and on and on. And with the exception of the Prozac (which was for 6 months at 16) all of this has been since I was 23.

Whatchu on bb? Since we're making lists? We are so medication twins.

[quiara]

I've debated the klonopin thing. I'm not on it and don't really want to be, but I know it helps with flashbacks, so when my pdoc brings it up, I consider it, but I dunno if I will or not. Right now I'm not on a whole ton -- I've got Citalopram (Celexa, but cheap! ^_^), Verapamil (calcium channel blocker for migraines), Imitrex (for migraines), trazodone (for insomnia/migraines), gabapentin (neurontin) for fibro, tramadol for fibro, zyrtec for allergies 'cause my system isn't built for life on earth, massive doses of Vit D, B-complex and C, and I think that's all right now. In the past, I've been on Xanax, Wellbutrin, Lexapro, Geodon (for a psychotic break I had), Zoloft (which was one of the worst experiences EVER) and... I don't remember what else. That's all from age 24ish. I'll be 30 this summer. I've been in the looney bin 2x, should have been more, but I'm doing really freaking well now and there's a post on LJ that I wanted to link you to re: your post the other day but I never did 'cause I suck, but it basically boils down to IT REALLY DOES GET BETTER AND I KNOW 'CAUSE I'M KIND OF THERE. <3

[quiara]

Also: MAKE YOUR BFF SET UP HER DREAMWIDTH, KTHX!

[cryfreedom]

I AM TO TELL YOU THAT HER INVITE HAS NOT COME THROUGH. SHE IS CHECKING HER EMAIL OBSESSIVELY AND IT IS NOT HERE!!!!

[quiara]

ZOMG UNACCEPTABLE! I WILL DM IT TO HER NOW!

[hillarygayle]

OMG I'M SO HAPPY YOU'RE HERE! *pets your strawberry*

When R has finished having her surgery I will tell you both about the most dumbass thing I have ever done, which thing also qualifies on my list of most badass things I have ever done.

[quiara]

Do I know about this?

[hillarygayle]

I'm sure! It's about how long I waited...or didn't wait...to eat post-wisdom tooth extraction & what it was I ate. ^o^

[quiara]

Oh yesh. Hee. Badass and dmubass indeed! ^_^